Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Things to be Thankful for

People don't seem to think about or talk about things that they are thankful for except at certain times of the year or when there's some major event going on in their life. Perhaps it's the hustle & bustle of life that keeps us so busy that we don't really even have time to stop & think about it.

I have been off work for over 5 months now and I have had plenty of time to think about things. Even when I was trying my best to keep myself distracted so that I wouldn't think about things it's hard not to. I have been meaning to write about being thankful for a month or so but I just haven't found the right time or wording to go with it.

As each week passes and I get closer & closer to having this baby there are more & more little things that I find myself being thankful for each day. Usually it involves sleep or food but these are very important things right now. My life practically revolves around sleep & food, perhaps this is why when babies are in their first few weeks of life that's all their world revolves around as well. 

Thankfully at least 2 days just about every week Keegan goes to stay with my grandma & I get a chance to rest & relax some in the middle of the week. If I had a prayer of making it through the rest of that week with him by myself I had to get those 2 days break. Now she's started coming over in the morning on the days that he's not with her just to help me out. That right there is a major thing to be thankful for in my books.

Today is one of those days that he is with her & I have most of the day to sleep, rest & relax but I am sitting here really missing him. The last week or so he has been extremely affectionate. He wants lots & lots of "love" and one kiss is just not enough. He is snuggling up against me as he watches tv & plays on his phone & we're both happiest with my arm wrapped around him. He is such an independent child, always wanting to do everything "all myself" that these moments are incredibly precious to me. I miss all the snuggle time we had when he was a baby, before he started running everywhere.

I was so proud when he started walking at 11 months but at the same time it was the end of my "baby". I know that soon I am going to have my hands full with a newborn & I may not have as much time for him as I do now so I'm doing my best to soak it up while I can. I think it's good for both of us to have this bonding time before "baby broder" comes along. Today I am thankful for his sweet little face & loving nature. I can't wait to see him in a few hours & hopefully get some sweetness out of him.

A few weeks ago I remember my husband's alarm went off at 6am & I heard talking from Keegan's room. He was awake at 6am  reading his Sesame Street ABC Book. He ended up crawling up in bed with me after my husband got in the shower. I was so exhausted after a night of little sleep that all I could think of at that moment was oh thank goodness he's going to Granny today haha. I think that was the week that started this though process of being thankful for the little things because nearly every morning that week it was something like "thank goodness he slept til 8:30 this morning" or "thank goodness he went back to sleep after fussing at 6:45 & let me get another hour or so of sleep."

With growing discomfort, increasing back pain & my heart back on the fritz I am thankful for every little break, spurt of energy, or general moment of well being or contentment that I can get. The last two weekends I've gone through little nesting phases & gotten quite a bit of stuff done. The 1st weekend it was a variety of things but included getting the new baby clothes washed & hung up, rearranging where we keep some of Keegan's stuff & making some room for all the baby bottles etc that we will be using again.

Saturday after getting the last of my baby registry stuff done & some shopping, it was the kitchen that received most of the attention at home. The counters seem to be the piling station for anything that is brought into the house and the table had managed to slowly accrue it's own stash of assorted junk at the far end where nobody sits. Thankfully Jon was also being bothered by the kitchen mess so he helped put away items that did not belong in there while I did dishes, wiped off the counters & table, swept the floor, prepared a bunch of the stuff for dinner & with his mixing expertise made a delicious experiment of GF brownies.

Every time that I go on one of these nesting crusades I feel incredibly accomplished when I'm done but my body hates me for a few days. I could hardly get up by myself or walk on Sunday & Monday. Thankfully I got my grandma to come over yesterday because when you're doing a zombie shuffle there is no way you can keep up with a 2yr old. Luckily after my afternoon nap my back was behaving much better. I'm still slightly regretting being so active on Saturday but still, it just felt so damn good at the time.

I have friends & family going through a wide variety of things, there are many new babies out there or like me babies on the way. Some of the women have been or still are struggling through fertility problems similar, yet different to those that I have. Then there are those dealing with the shocking news that even though they were on birth control they're going to be expecting another child.

People are losing jobs, finding jobs, making new relationships & just going on with their lives. Some may take the time to stop & think about the things in their life that they have to be thankful for, some like me, may take the time to realize what they are thankful for each day. No matter what category that you may fall under I do truly believe that everything happens for a reason. The funny thing about that is that I met an aquantance of Jon's on Saturday that said the same thing. He believes that everything happens for a reason & I had to agree. So many things have happened in my life in the last few years a lot good but also a lot bad but I have managed to keep going & rolling with the punches that life throws my way. I didn't realize it until just now but more & more over the last few years that has become my motto. Everything happens for a reason. Stay strong & have faith that everything will work out as it's meant to be and at some point you will see the light at the end of the tunnel.

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