Friday, July 27, 2012

The Problem With Boys

I'm sure that any mother with a son has experienced many of the same problems that I'm going to talk about in this post but for those of you who don't, or whose sons are still small enough to not be at this stage yet, be prepared.

Keegan is great at going to the bathroom now. He usually even wakes up in the morning & from naps with a dry pull up. This is not the issue. The issue is that he cannot seem to control his wiener (typical problem with men as well now that I think about it). Granted I am not a boy, therefore I do not have a wiener to deal with but I cannot understand what is so hard about holding onto the thing & pointing it into the toilet to pee.

It's not even just when he's standing either. It happens even when he's sitting down. The last two nights it's happened standing up, but the problem there was just that he waited too long to go to the bathroom & started peeing almost as soon as his shorts were down. This morning he didn't have that issue but still a mess!

I finally told him no more standing today, to just sit down. While I supervised him the first time sitting there were no problems amazingly.

This is a conversation that I had with his father just a bit ago.

Me: I think I may have to revoke Keegan's male card.
Me: on the plus side the whole house has been mopped again
Jon: did he have one?
Me: yes, a little male card
Me: male in training even
Me: every single time he has gone to the bathroom today he has gotten pee on the floor
Me: I'm sure it was premature of me to bother mopping because I'm sure he'll do it more tonight but the bathroom was starting to smell
Jon: Tell him to sit his ass down and point the wiener IN the toilet
Me: he has the last 2 or 3 times & he still manages to get pee all over the place
Me: his hand, the floor, the side of the counter or the side of the bathtub
Jon: he is pushing it to hard and bending it so the head is pointing up again

How is this even possible? How could you not know? Men say that the female mind is a mystery. The true mystery is the mind of a child.

At least my floors are clean again. Combine the wonderful smell of Pine Sol & the chicken breasts in salsa that are in the slow cooker & my house not only smells clean but edible as well. Though Pine Sol or no, I would not eat anything in Keegan's bathroom.

Wish me luck with no more pee on the floor until cleaning day on Monday. (HA! I know I dream big)

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